#which is actually really good timing all things considered

[calicocreatures]

and to underscore the realistic part: you don't have to do all of these at once! pick one or two to try; then when they feel like routine, or once you've decided they don't work for you, try one or two more. you're not "doing a bad job" if you're not doing all of these. it's a learning journey, and not all of these will work for every kind of person. these are just ideas for you to play with as you determine what sustainable living looks like for you.

doing one or two at a time will also make it more manageable to take my advice on this next point, which is... to do your research on practices you implement.

as i was reading this list my first instinct was to think of the ways in which some of these practices need to be complicated, or ways in which i have heard their impact is not what we've been taught. which i don't think is a helpful attitude when we're building knowledge. we should think critically about steps as we go - but that doesn't mean we should wait to "know everything" before we try try something, explore ideas or start conversation.

some of the things that could be worth researching, thinking about, and having conversations about as you go:

when buying reusable products: try to learn a bit about how many uses are typically expected, and about the environmental impact of producing certain types of reusable products (plastics, for example) vs. their substitute disposable products.

when eating vegan/vegetarian meals: learn about where the animal/meat-free products come from. who is making them and how? are they produced under humane conditions?

when reducing processed food intake: what is the negative impact we're trying to mitigate? does it apply to all processed foods, or only specific types?

letting non invasive weeds grow: this is a really fun one to dig into. apps like iNaturalist have been really helpful as a starting point to figure out what the plant is, and then i like to look up the plant's name in other sources to learn more about it. i have even learned that some plants considered "weeds" are actually good to eat! (burdock is one of my backyard friends in this category.)

A list of (realistic) things you can do to be more environmentally friendly

(from an earth-loving horticulture student.)

— COSMETICS

Use bar soap instead of soap bottles

Use old toothbrushes for cleaning surfaces

Try exploring and researching some homemade face/body/lip products

Use ice sleeves, sunglasses, and caps instead of sunscreen (Edit: I’ve seen people say that it is safer and even necessary to wear sunscreen at all times so try to use eco friendly sunscreen instead! In my country it’s pretty uncommon to wear sunscreen often as we usually wear ice sleeves which is why I did not know this oof)

Use coffee grinds or homemade tumeric masks instead of cosmetic products with exfoliator beads

Invest in a metal ear cleanser instead of cotton buds

Try placing more importance on skincare instead of contributing to exploitative beauty companies by buying makeup

Use cosmetic products that do not contain palm oil

— CLOTHING

Try as much as possible to rewear your outfits at least twice before washing them

Actually WEAR your clothes! I know some of y’all just wear them once for your Instagram post and let it rot in your closet forever. Stop doing that!

Thrift, stitch up holes in your clothes, and use second hand clothing instead of supporting fast fashion companies like SHEIN, H&M, Zara, etc.

Cut up your old clothing into yarn and do macramè with it

Cut patches of old clothing to turn into reusable cotton pads

Learn how to knit, crochet or stitch your clothes!

If you use tampons, try menstrual cups or discs instead. If you use pads, try reusable pads or period underwear. (Trust me, it works). Also, use reusable panty liners instead of disposable ones. They may seem expensive but you will end up saving a lot more in the long run

— GARDENING

Plant seeds/cuttings in your old bottles, jars, and containers

Propagate your plants and exchange cuttings with your friends instead of buying new plants

Make your own soil mixes instead of buying soil mixes

Better yet, don’t use soil for your indoor plants and try getting into hydroponics or semihydroponics instead. This saves so much water and doesn’t contribute to mining of soil

Fertilise plants with fruit peels, coffee grinds, and tea leaves. (DO NOT use chemical fertiliser on soil)

Plant more legume plants in your garden instead of using nitrogen fertilisers. (Look up the nitrogen cycle if you need an explanation on this)

Avoid pesticides unless really needed. Try sprinkling cinnamon powder on soil or spraying neem oil on plants and soil to keep away pests.

If you have a lawn, try looking into rain gardens and consider making one

Let the (non invasive) weeds in your lawn/garden grow! They are there for a reason!

Stop killing earthworms and millipedes in your garden. This also applies to snails native to your region. They are there for a reason.

Water used to wash fruits and rice can be used to water plants

— REDUCE, REUSE

Use the caps of jars as soap holders

Use recycled paper/notebooks

Wash and dry your glass/plastic items before throwing them in the recycling bin

Keep any plastic bags for future use

Use eco friendly or reusable dish sponges

Use reusable straws and cups

Invest in a fabric cup holder

Bring a water bottle with you wherever you go

Drink more water and less sugary drinks

Bring reusable bags for buying groceries instead of using plastic ones

Always keep a folded up tote/shopping bag with you in case you spontaneously decide to buy something

— ELECTRICITY

Set a timer on your air conditioning instead of letting it run throughout the night

Better yet, use a fan instead of an air conditioner

Open your windows! Aerate your home!

Allow natural light to enter your home during the daytime, so as to avoid turning on your lights

Switch to LED lightbulbs instead of regular lightbulbs

Turn off any switches in your house when they are not in use

Collect the water from your air conditioner/dehumidifier condenser and use that to water plants, clean surfaces, steam ironing, and flushing toilets. Do not drink it though!

— INTERNET

Delete your all of your unwanted emails

Delete your inactive social media accounts

Try not to post excessively on social media and stop scrolling excessively too. This not only reduces energy usage but also improves your mental health and productivity

Try to keep to one social media app instead of having so many

Reduce your internet usage

Save your eBooks on a thumbdrive instead of on cloud

Use Ecosia instead of Google

Stop being influenced by social media trends that only just contribute to consumerism

Download music instead of streaming

Reduce online shopping

— FOOD

Reduce intake of processed foods

Reduce intake of fish, beef, and dairy

Try eating vegan or vegetarian foods at least once or twice a week

Cook your own meals instead of eating out

Bring your own food containers when taking away food from stores

Beeswax wrap instead of cling wrap!

Buy loose-leaf tea or plastic free tea bags instead of regular tea bags

Eat more mushrooms, vegetables, and fruits and drink more water

Support local farmers

And finally, educate yourself more about ecology and the environment!

[zeropro]

So I’ve seen you draw and tag a couple of different ships, just wondering which are your favorite???

Love your art btw :D

Thank you!

I don’t have a specific ship i'm particularly loyal to, so I guess I’ll rate them and also provide my own headcanons:

(disclaimer i dont know ship names so imma just try my best)

Trine-shipping: yes, put the three of them together, I don’t care. familial, sexual, romantic, platonic, its all good. I go crazy seeing them stand next to each other in the cartoon what do you want from me.

thunderwarp: I see this one a lot and I quite like it. these two being mates with starscream doing his own thing kinda makes sense considering starscream has a bunch of other ships. also makes it fun when something happens to one of them and starscream is left in the awkward position of having to deal with that.

thunderstar: been thinking about this one more lately. they’re like foils to each other. thundercracker’s a good boy to starscream’s bad boy, and he does such a concern about all the morally dubious stuff starscream gets up to. but at the same time, he admires starscream’s ambition and rizz and starscream the kinda bot that would pull you so high if you followed him. I think out of anyone, starscream is the closest to actually trusting thundercracker. 

starwarp: i had this thought one time of what if skywarp is like the horniest asexual and starscream is the most traumatized aromantic, and how would that even work XD nothing solid in the works just an idea that I had. ive seen these two less often outside of trine shipping but it can be pretty hot. I like when they are being protective of each other. I always see skywarp as more emotionally open than his trinemates and starscream can use some of that open and honest emotional love and care. someone to forcfully make him accept being loved. someone who will actually push back when he’s being stupid. and with skywarp being loyal to megatron, so much angst potential for both of them.

starbee: im a sucker for the whole ghost bee starscream dynamic. I already made a post about these two, and after all this time I still really enjoy this ship. I think characters that don’t actually like each other at first but grow into a mutual respect is so tasty. I think some people don’t like the ship because they headcanon bee as too young? well, starscream is actually younger in my fic lmao, but also they’re like 6 million years old and are born with full adult processing capabilities, I don’t think age matters here :P its less about intimacy for me anyway. I like them together because of how much it takes to get there. 

starwavewave: okay this one is 100% fueled by tfone but guyssss guysss theyre married and megatron is their son and im just aaaagh dont seperate them! such a kookie dynamic, the cool headed soundwave, the emotionally volatile shockwave, the arrogant yet cowardly starscream, all being fail dads to their little scamp leader. hahaha. high command polycule 

megastar: gasp, rated above skystar. yes, I just find this dynamic more interesting. I like an abusive ship sometimes for the angst but I also enjoy seeing megatron when he isnt abusive? kinda catharsis maybe. I read a fic once where the war is over and starscream invites megatron to one of optimus’ high profile parties and is appalled at megatron showing up in robot equivalent of underdressed, meanwhile megatron the working class miner is like “I washed, what else was I supposed to do” XD and I just love that haha. theres just so many ways to take it. I wont be doing any megastar in my au, I just tag anything that has megatron and starscream interacting with megastar cuz thats the dynamic to me

skystar/jetstar: iddkkkkk i know this is the most popular ship but it’s just!! idk! its not as interesting to me haha. I love this as a past ship, they were roommates in college, starscream opened himself to someone, chose to become close and then was hurt by it. just another wound on starscream’s spark before he ever even meets megatron. I don’t think theyd get back together after the ice. idk how well I can write this so I’ll just explain how it happens in my au here: skyfire died and starscream created this version of skyfire in his mind that was perfect, he memorialised him because he was dead! you just cant live up to how someone remembers you. I think that was part of the reason why starscream reacts so badly when skyfire “betrayed” him. unlike thundercracker, skyfire knows how to set healthy boundaries. not to mention he’d been on ice for four million years, lost his entire life, everyone he knows, and his entire civilisation, planet, and culture to a war he had no part in. bot’s gonna be upset. pissed off even. skyfire shouldnt have to be some soft sparked punching bag for starscream, he’s kind and a pacifist but he’s also going to get upset and have feelings. I think starscream’s betrayal would hit pretty hard, he’d gonna be upset about how much starscream’s changed, how much damage starscream helped cause during the war, and also starscream shooting him in the back for wanting to protect the native wildlife! when they properly talk to each other again it’s going to be heated on both sides, and I think after some hard work from both sides they could end up in a place where they are willing to be friends again, but I don’t think they’d conjunx. skystar isnt end game to me, but it is canon and an important part of the story

starop: I think ive read one fic where I really liked this ship. it’s just such a random pairing. my initial reaction is just noooo optimus prime?? but that guy’s everyone’s dad! Ive been told a big part of it is they’re both megatron’s ex’s and that’s pretty funny. not for me sadly haha (opxmegatronoldmanyaoiotpfrfr)

starjack…wheelstar? whatever the starscream and wheeljack one is. I’m not into this one. I see where people are coming from with it, but wheeljack isnt an interesting character to me. they can be science bros tho

starscream and windblade: ive seen this like once or twice. not for me. windblade is like, starscream’s daughter or something idk XD 

soundstar: uuuh i dont see it. sorry! i legit have no thoughts on soundstar. theyre coworkers XD. ive seen fics where the seekers are really young and soundwave moms them, and that’s really cute. okay, I like soundwave as a caretaker if the seekers are young, but yeah I don’t think I understand this one. 

shockstar: nooooooo. tho ironically theres more canon content there to fuel this one than soundstar (is this emotion?) but still no XD I don’t even hate shockwave! let him be sunstorm’s dad, that’s cute. but no, shockewave too creepy. no ship. they are also coworkers

what other ship is there even? oh yeah

starprowl: this is apparently a really popular ship?! I guess in a way prowl is sort of like the autobot’s starscream, undermining his leader, arrogant, willing to do the dubious play. they’re both ruthless. I like this one better than starjacked, but its still an odd pairing to me.

oh! knockout and starscream, i can kinda see it? like, as a rebound after breakdown? I like knock out and breakdown, so I’d only see these two as like friends or if something happened to breakdown. they’re a LOT of fun when they interact tho heh heh, perfectly clashing personalities

on the topic of tfp, I guess starscream and arcee is a ship? I can see this similar to my enjoyment of starbee, they’d have to work reeaally hard for this one to work but they have had potentially positive interactions in the show (before starscream screws it up) so its possible in a better world where starscream doesnt suck they could become friends. him killing cliffjumper is gonna be a huge hurdle tho! 

dont talk to me about airachnid

do people ship starscream and ratchet? I don’t ship it, but I do really like interactions between them. starscream is so terrible but he also gets hurt a lot. ratchet is grumpy and prejudice but he’s the best doctor and he’ll fix him up! I like when something terrible happens to starscream and ratchet cant help but feel bad for the guy. that’s the good stuff.

lastly i have been asked a few times on trinebee. im assuming this is bumblebee and the trine. i hadnt thought about it but it makes sense! if youre a starbee shipper, but you also support trine propaganda, then it only makes sense to bring bee into the trine. also bee and thundercracker are friends! the only ones who havent really had any interaction is bee and warp, and honestly idk if I see those two getting along but bumblebee is everybody’s friend so XD I’m sure it’ll work out!

and i think those are all the thoughts i have on the ships! 

no hate on anyone who ships any of these!!! you all do what you do, these are just my opinions, and honestly I’m just not a huge shipper to begin with haha. I am…unsure if there will be any shipping content in my au, I write my scenarios very much “canon but to the left” and so it comes out very sex-less because romance and intimacy is just not the type of content I’m in the business of writing. but, idk, i think about it sometimes. sometimes I think about the end of chapter one of thundercracker’s origin, the night starscream took thundercracker out on a not-date. i think, who knows, in some version of the story maybe they shared a kiss? maybe they went back to the apartment and things went further? maybe. but of course, in every version of the story, starscream is gone the next morning. 

happy valentrine’s day!

[suzukiblu]

Day two of February’s third weekly WIP behind the cut; “interdimensional kidnapping via Robin”. (( chrono || non-chrono ))

Kon cries a lot harder; hard enough he clearly can’t talk past it, hard enough to shake with it, and like–he’s not a small kid, honestly. He’s the smallest that Tim’s ever seen a version of Kon, yes, but he’s pretty big for his physiological age. Which, like–not surprising that he would be, really. He’s definitely in the expected top percentile for a ten year-old, if not over the expected top percentile. Tim would put him somewhere between 4’10” and 5’ and at probably a good hundred pounds or so, which puts him maybe nine to seven inches shorter than Tim himself is and maybe, like, forty-five or fifty pounds lighter. So . . . about seventy percent of his own body weight, give or take. And Tim probably has a concussion and at least a couple broken ribs, and definitely has plenty of cuts and abrasions and bruises deep enough that he doesn’t even want to think about how long it’s going to be until he’s field-ready again. 

He doesn’t do goddamn Bat-level training to not be able to pick up and carry a crying kid no matter what condition he’s personally in, though.

Tim scoops Kon up into his arms and the kid makes a startled little noise about it that cracks through one of his sobs, then grabs the front of his suit just next to the “R” decal tight enough that the body armor creaks and buies his face in his neck to cry even harder. He doesn’t hold onto him any more than that, but he’s still as close to clinging to him as he can get. 

Well–no, his TTK is definitely clinging to him, whether his actual physical body is or not. 

Tim wonders exactly how many times this kid’s been held by someone–at least how many times that he remembers being held by someone, anyway–but all things considered is pretty sure he wants the answer to be “none”. If Luthor really is the only person that this version of Kon remembers ever having been touched by . . . 

Yeah. Tim definitely wants the answer to be “none”, ugly as that thought is. 

“S-sorry,” Kon gasps brokenly into his neck. “M’sorry, m’s-sorry, I d-don’t–I dunno why, I–I can’t s-s-stop, I–” 

“It’s alright, kid,” Tim says, and doesn’t let his voice get any tighter. Really, it’s impressive Kon didn’t fall apart sooner. Or . . . depressing, maybe. “I’m just gonna carry you for a bit now. Just tell me if you want down, okay?” 

“I don’t,” Kon sobs, his TTK going tight. “Don’t put me down, don’t–please.” 

“Okay,” Tim says, and fucking hates Lex Luthor. 

He walks the rest of the way to the marina with Kon curled up in his arms and crying into his neck; digging his fingers into his body armor and his TTK into all of his bruises. Tim might need to do some repairs on the armor later but is really not concerned about it right now. It’s just a footnote to take care of before he tries to go on patrol in this specific suit again, that’s all. It already needed some fixing up anyway, after spending seventy-six hours going through the wringer in a reality that shitty. 

Also, like, he guesses he needs some fixing up after that too, admittedly. 

[bambi-kinos]

Dakota Days Review

I got an ask requesting I post the Dakota Days review. The rest of the ask will be mega long so I don't want to just add on the review to the end and make it an even bigger read. So I'm posting this as its own free-floating thing.

So my deal is that in 2023 and 2024 I had enough time on my hands that I read a shitton of Beatle books (including most of the books in my big recommendation post, which I am still thinking about updating so keep in mind it hasn't achieved its final form.) I regularly talk these over with a friend and this review is mostly what I told her when she asked if she should read it or not. Either this will sell you on the book or it will not lol. I did some light editing for readability but otherwise it is mostly intact from the original post date February 13, 2023....good God, 2 fucking years ago!

Okay so Dakota Days. It's an account of John Green, also known as Charlie Swan who was a tarot reader that was close to the Lennons following John's return from his Lost Weekend.

Charlie states from the start that he is only trying to impart a snapshot of what it was like to live with John and Yoko during this time. He straight up admits that he has edited out certain parts of it to respect their privacy (and to cover his own ass as he did his fair share of scamming Yoko during this period.) He also straight up admits that he smushed together many years, events, and conversations in the book. He explains this very sensibly: while he claims a prodigious memory (which will prove not to be the case) he also says that he just spent too many years in John and Yoko's employment to recount all of them without boring the reader.

This is a very effective tactic. Charlie is deliberately telling us something that he is doing (editing the accounts of what happened) because it will make us trust him more. Being honest about misdoings you've done or will do tends to get people to like you more. This is what con artists do when they are trying to get people to fall for their schemes: they will tell you what they are doing and then they will do it. It is effective because it works. Charlie tells us that he is either misremembering or covering his own ass and because he does this we like him, which primes us to accept everything he says.

Charlie gets called up by Yoko only a few hours after John drags home. She renames him Charlie Swan because she knows John will be jealous of him having the same name. Charlie goes along with it because he knows Yoko is an easy mark; he claims in the text that he found John at Disney World of all places and that this is how Yoko ended the long weekend. Considering this is not how it happened we can guess that what Charlie actually did was pull the wool over Yoko's eyes and then claim credit for it. Again, a very effective tactic.

What happens next is really interesting: John feigns being poisoned. He's told Yoko that May poisoned him in his tea. Charlie reads the cards and they tell him "no way was John poisoned" and John leverages this to get Yoko out of the room. John picks Charlie's brain about the occult for a while and then lets him go home after a few hours.

Won't recount everything that happens next but I will say this: Dakota Days is the second half of the story about John's Dakota years and it compliments Fred's book perfectly. Fred depicted a manic John and a cold, distant Yoko. Charlie depicts a depressive John and an anxious Yoko in desperate need of hand holding at every single stage in her life. The amount of time and money that John and Yoko spend on con artists like Charlie as well as their other astrologers, mystics, and Korean herb healers is astounding. They were completely and utterly paralyzed with terror if they had to make decisions on their own. Indecisive, fretful, worried, anxious, Yoko straight up has a panic attack at one point because Charlie orders her to make a decision on her own and she almost dissolves into tears because she can't do it.

The funny part is I find none of these depictions at odd with one another. Yoko's imperious mask always hid the frightened baby underneath and John's aggressive ego always hid the broken hearted lover who wanted to be anywhere but where he was. Yoko didn't give Fred an "in" because he was a servant but she feared and respected Charlie so she could afford to be a broken little girl in front of him. John respected Charlie as a magician and hung on his every word. He didn't see a point in pretending to be something he wasn't like he did with Fred.

Charlie's big thing in the book is that he depicts himself as Spitting Straight Facts at John and Yoko. He condenses these into different conversations. For example, at one point Yoko takes John to Japan for a few months because she wants to convince him to live there full time. All of their clothes are packed according to what Charlie's tarot cards tell them are lucky to take. Yoko asks him to cast spells to keep John in a good mood. They plan out their journey to follow certain directions based on Japanese numerology that calculates the luck of cardinal directions. (Charlie cheerfully admits that this is outside of his education so he can't give an opinion on it. This is part of his set up, he doesn't have a problem admitting his weaknesses which makes him come off as more honest than he really is.)

It all goes wrong within two weeks: John hates Japan. Absolutely hates it. He hates having to entertain Yoko's family. He hates the hotels they are in. Yoko calls Charlie on the verge of tears and tells him that John is humiliating her in front of her family -- apparently Yoko's mother and sister called Yoko out on her bullshit and they accused her of accomplishing nothing with her art. (Holy shit, based?!) Yoko is desperate for John's wealth and status to impress her mother and tells Charlie, "I know what they say about me, they say that all I did was marry John and spend his money!" Which is of course absolutely true.

Yoko is desperate to win her mother's favor because she wants Sean to get a sizable piece of the inheritance but she was so disgusted with Yoko that she wouldn't even acknowledge Sean. (Brutal.) Yoko takes this personally because her sister Setsuko married a Westerner, a diplomat, and Yoko dissolves into hysterics over the phone demanding that Charlie tarot read for new, luckier clothes and have them air mailed to them. As far as I know, Charlie did it because it was an order and Yoko was paying his bills.

It gets worse though because John starts shuffling around like a zombie, moaning, whacking his head against the walls, etc. He tells Charlie that he's pretending to be dead. (I actually think I know what John was doing -- he probably absorbed some of Japan's pop culture about ghosts and he started imitating it.) This freaks out Yoko's family and her mother asked what the hell she was doing bringing this fucked up white guy to Japan. Charlie depicts himself as being the only person John can vent to which is something that I actually believe even though it probably didn't go down in precisely this way.

When Yoko tells John that they're going home soon, John perks up. He starts wooing Yoko's mother and makes nice with her. The funny part is that after all that, John actually succeeded in making Yoko's mother like him! Of course Yoko calls Charlie, again almost in tears, and tells him "John is doing it all wrong, he's being friendly with her, he's not holding her at a distance, he's buying her things and taking her out to fancy eateries!" Yoko is depicted as flat out hysterical in this conversation, enraged and upset that John charmed his way into her mother's good graces instead of making her submit by being ice cold and imperious (aka acting like Mimi) which dissolves her into anguish. And then, at the end of it all, Charlie says that Yoko is being ridiculous and it's a good thing that John is finally getting along with her mother. (Hittin' hard with that street wisdom!) Yoko is very bitter in response. After that chapter I thought, "man Charlie is putting up with a lot huh."

The entire book goes this way. It depicts a John that will make grand gestures towards Yoko (he has Charlie perform a "druidic" marriage ceremony to reaffirm his marriage to Yoko and Charlie has a GREAT time making shit up and forcing John to gather all this bullshit stuff that has nothing to do with Celtic traditions, Charlie's account is so so gleeful about making John dance like a monkey) but actively loathes her the rest of the time. Charlie outright states that their relationship is unhappy.

For example, when Sean was born, John was crazy with worry and made up the Dakota to be more comfortable for Yoko and the baby. But when Yoko finally came home she immediately handed Sean to the nanny (which John HATED, he tried to make her pick Sean back up because he was so upset) and went to her room after a huge fight with John. John then sat down with Charlie and bitterly vented about the fact that he knew Yoko didn't appreciate him and that he was furious that she smoked through her pregnancy and that she wasn't interested in Sean. He accuses her of making Sean sick which is probably true considering Yoko was probably on heroin through out the pregnancy! John is actually kind of stunning here because he is utterly pissed off at Yoko for putting Sean's health at risk and then snubbing John when she finally gets home. His breakdown when Yoko comes home is incredible. They have a baby that she hyped up to Charlie as a Messiah and then she didn't want him. And it still didn't make her love John. The despair in his words.

A lot of the conversations that Charlie depicts follows this pattern. At one point John gets so angry about Yoko's coldness that he picks a fight with her, gets in her face, and just starts screaming at her. She runs out of the room crying because she's frightened of him and then calls Charlie to do a tarot card reading on why John was so mad at her. Charlie speculates it's because she doesn't communicate well with John and he was trying to shake something loose. She goes on a long rant about why this can't possibly be the case because she's only doing what's best for him so please Charlie read the cards…. of course when Charlie spoke to John, John replied that he was angry that Yoko speaks Japanese because he doesn't understand what she's saying to the servants and he thinks that they're talking about him. He's paranoid and angry that she's doing something that he can't get involved with. So he started screaming at her and throwing cigarette packets at her.

At times like this, when Yoko and John are fighting, Charlie takes on an interesting role. He will tell them hard truths about their relationship that they don't like. When Yoko whines that John is being too independent in 1979, Charlie tells her that this is a good thing and that she should be happy that John doesn't need to be managed. He also tells her that she and John will be happier if they are independent of each other. This bounces off Yoko completely and she whines (Yoko is VERY childish in this book) that this isn't possible or safe because John is too stupid (!!) and naive (!!) to make decisions on his own.

Charlie very deliberately depicts himself almost as a marriage counselor to them. You can see his prodigious perfect memory fails him at these junctures because when he relays conversations, John and Yoko don't sound like themselves most of the time. But the funny part is, I totally believe it. I actually do think that Charlie Swan had moments where he gave his unvarnished opinion about JohnandYoko to John and Yoko. He could do this safely for a few reasons:

1) He knew they considered him superior to them. He successfully dug a foothold in their minds and had them both totally convinced that he was legit. They couldn't throw him out because he was their closest tarot reader and it looks like he also had a legitimate head for business because he was able to give them some good financial advice. All of this meant that they were in awe of him and neither of them wanted to go against what he said. They were completely at his mercy. In a way I think it's lucky that Charlie wasn't more malicious because he could have manipulated John and Yoko into doing some depraved shit if he felt like it. They both worshipped him completely. Independent sources verified that John called Charlie "the Oracle" and it wasn't all a jest.

2) Conmen are incredibly good at reading people. They see our weaknesses and they understand them. He had John and Yoko sized up the moment he met them. He realized John and Yoko were both inherently childish, very credulous, willing to believe anything, and that they would only take the easy way out. They wanted self improvement to come only at the cost of their check books. They loved spending money (I think they both had shopping addictions -- I know because I have a shopping addiction) and they didn't want to be disciplined in the slightest. In fact Charlie depicts several moments where outside parties force John and Yoko to be disciplined and they both react like children being forced to sit in the time out chair.

3) John and Yoko, being very petulant, lazy, and weak at this stage of their lives, were totally impervious to criticism. John at least admitted that he knew Charlie was right about certain things but Yoko always had excuses for why she couldn't give John a longer leash/respect him as her life partner, be nice to her mother (Charlie at one point straight up asks why she's being such a bitch to her mother and Yoko is full of pathetic excuses), spend time with her baby, etc. (She couldn't buy farmland on her own because she didn't know how to ascertain if any of the property was good, so she had Charlie do readings so she didn't have to take responsibility for it.) John and Yoko did not want to shoulder any kind of responsibility for anything at all. They are both depicted as sleepwalking through life, becoming outraged when anything temporarily waylaid them.

You could give them as many hard truths as you wanted and it would never take because they will never ever accept it or act on it or own their mistakes. John and Yoko are often at odds in the book, screaming and arguing with each other, John fucking things up on purpose for Yoko's family, but when it comes to Growing The Hell Up, they were a united couple saying "no the hell we will not!"

This is reading between the lines now but I think Charlie is straight up laughing at them at some points and he's letting us in on the joke. He knows that so long as they remain petulant and undisciplined, he will always have a job. So he can tell them honestly to their faces that they are bad parents, that they are a terrible couple, that John is a sullen asshole and Yoko is a whiny bitch, and they will never ever fire him. They will argue with him but Yoko will have him back in her bedroom in 15 minutes to get him to read tarot cards for her again.

A few things I found interesting:

Sean is not portrayed at all in the book. John once describes Sean as overly quiet and meek especially around John and John says it's because he knows Sean is frightened of him. Interesting that this is at odds with Fred's portrayal of Sean. However I actually feel a little soft towards Charlie Swan on this because I think he did it to protect Sean, the way he said he would protect the Lennons' privacy at the beginning of the book. I legit think he was shielding Sean because Sean under 18 when Charlie published this. I think he didn't want Sean to have to wrestle with being depicted in a memoir at that age. The Dakota situation is so fucked up that I legit believe that this expert scam artist might have been in the only moral person on John and Yoko's payroll. I say this because Charlie is absolutely fearless towards John and Yoko in this book so he clearly didn't give a shit about being sued for libel. So IMO he did it to protect Sean because Sean was only a child.

John goes in a 15 month depression in 1978 because Sean once asked him (after seeing one of their poor cats fall out of a window) what happened to the cat that died. John tells him that the cat went to the Land of the Dead because it fell, explaining that nothing can survive a fall out of a window that high. Sean apparently thought about it and said "then Daddy, why haven't you walked out the window?" Jesus Christ.

Charlie scolds John for being a shitty parent and tells him that Sean is just a kid and that he doesn't understand what he's saying. He's just repeating things that he's heard around the house, and if you read between the lines you can feel Charlie judging John and Yoko because Charlie understands that this exposure to the occult is fucking Sean up. John becomes very surly and asks him "how the hell do you know" to which Charlie replies "I studied art therapy and child psychology in college for my teaching degree." (Independent verification has proven that this is true!) John sinks even deeper into a funk that yet another person is proving to be more knowledgeable about John's children than John himself, and rolls over in bed, beginning a 15 month period where he won't see anyone. He just lays there watching tv with the sound off.

Yoko is constantly on edge. She's obsessed with what people think of her. Charlie describes 1979/80 as being very trying because Yoko constantly repeating the same questions for Charlie to read for, trying to divine what stories journalists will write about her next.

John is similarly obsessed with having a positive PR image. He's deeply upset that no one liked his Rock n Roll or Shaved Fish albums (because they don't have new material.) John spends an entire chapter moaning that he hates his audience because they don't love him enough. Then he admits that he thinks he owes them new material but that he won't commit to anything without having a decent stock of songs to burn through. Then he swivels back to piling more blame onto his audience and continues bitching that they don't love him enough to make up for the anguish that he feels all the time. He piled a lot of blame and resentment onto The Public for not being able to "fix" his sadness.

At one point Yoko wants to buy blessings/curses from an actual witch so they go to Brazil. They find a bruja and Charlie intimates to the audience that brujas are expert con artists in a class of their own. He relates that a bruja once sabotaged a building project at which time the builders invited her onto the property to do an """exorcism""" from which she made a tidy profit and they were able to resume building. (Charlie does not depict it in precisely this way but he relates the story in such broad ""magical"" terms that you can see him grinning, pointing, winking, and nodding at you from across the room. Charlie made it as obvious as he possibly could that he was totally fucking with these people and that he knew when other magicians were fucking with people as well.)

Yoko has to sit through a week of a Brazilian woman putting her through fake and expensive rituals, all while putting on a fake Jamaican accent??? Yoko is so dumb and desperate that she doesn't see through it. Charlie is incredibly contemptuous through out the section. He does have an interesting "magic" battle with the bruja (here called Nora, her actual name was Lena) where they size each other up and the bruja agrees to take Yoko on as a client. Eventually Yoko gets cold feet and begs Charlie for a way to get her out of the rituals because she's scared that Nora mentioned a "blood sacrifice" and Yoko doesn't want to kill someone.

To which Charlie replies: "Yoko, why don't you just tell Nora how you feel? You're the client, if you don't want to make a blood sacrifice then just ask Nora to do something different. I don't think she's going to kill a person but if you're that worried then you can tell Nora about your concerns and she'll either change it or explain what will happen. You're paying her, remember?"

Yoko dissolves into more hysterics. She's scared the bruja will put a curse on her or Sean or John. She's too anxious to ask for clarification or help. Charlie rolls his eyes through the entire section.

Then the actual ritual happens, Nora kills a dove (poor thing) and then tells Yoko to sign her name to sell her soul to…something? I actually didn't understand what, though Charlie told Yoko "it's impossible for you to sell your soul so just go along with it dumbass."

But Yoko melts down. She can't do it. She begs Charlie to sign on her behalf and it sounds like she was actually crying because she was so scared. Charlie and Nora both sigh but Charlie signs the document and Nora goes "okay, done!"

Yoko then asks Charlie "Hey did you sign Charlie Swan or John Green?" To which Charlie replies, "what makes you think I signed either of those names?" Yoko freaks out and follows him around going "What name did you sign?? Whose soul did you sell??? Charlie?!!!! Charlie!!!!" But he never tells her lmao. He is so fucking contemptuous of her, it's amazing. This sequence is Charlie Swan rubbing his superiority in Yoko's face with utter glee, and he completely gets away with it. She's too scared to argue with him.

Obviously Charlie doesn't talk about everything here. For example, he and Sam Green both pulled a fast one on Yoko by counterfeiting a painting and selling it to her -- her own boyfriend! It was a complete success, she paid them both handsomely for it. He doesn't talk about that here. But it's clear from the outset IMO that he lies his ass off about tarot reading through out the entire book and is able to do as well as he does because he does actually have some good business sense.

I have to be honest: I respect the fuck out of Charlie Swan. This man is a king. He scammed John and Yoko out of millions. He did so well that he could tell them how awful they were to their faces and they had no choice but to swallow it whole. They didn't have the sac to stand up to him. And he was kind enough to write this book and show us how he did it: by taking advantage of their fear, petulance, and refusal to grow up. Dakota Days is an amazing book.

I have decided that the rocknroll industry is one big trailer park and John and Yoko had the biggest trailer. John is straight up wandering around in a robe and curlers reading the astrology and Dear Abby sections of the newspaper, Yoko is knocking back forties wondering when she can upgrade to the younger model. Sean is their poor kid with a learning disorder that is doing the pyromaniac thing. Going to Swiss boarding school (so that Yoko didn't have to be reminded of John) is probably what straightened him out and saved him.

Not trying to diss trailer parks, I met a lot of nice people who lived in them when I worked insurance, so pulling more from sitcom trash here. But John and Yoko fought, a lot, like these types of couples always do (that anecdote of Pete Shotton's second phone call where Yoko is screaming her head off in the background. I live next to a trashy family like this.) Who knows what Sean heard and what he repeated because he was so young.

This is the book that convinced me that John retreated into the Dakota out of shame. He knew that being with Paul was the best thing that ever happened to him, the only good thing, and he fucked it up with drugs and untreated mental illness. Which sadly has to be hung around his own neck. He blew his life up for no reason and he hid because he knew that.

John thought there were only two options: go back to Yoko or eat crow and go back to Paul. He couldn't stand either but at least with Yoko he didn't have to dance for the press. It never occurred to him that he had options and could do anything.

[khorneschosen]

Have you ever heard the famous quote that which can be expressed without evidence can be dismissed without evidence.

I don't have a reply because my reply would be that this was off topic one two that it does not directly deal with my argument and three within the context of this could be just swept a side as irrelevant to our current conversation.

So in short your card form of argumentation is invalid but hey there was a point found in that. So I'll answer it just to let you.

And then I had to ask myself the question is it really possible to argue to you that perhaps what you're seeing through your very very I'm sure very objective media buys is not very rational because the one question is when you consider his past run and how he picked people and his current run it seems like he's picking people willing to bear the slings and arrows alongside him which was a major flaw and the people he picked last time.

Most people had to deal with your peoples insanity and decided fuck it I don't want to have to deal with this. But thankfully you guys have canceled so many people that there is a bond to be had by the fact that so many are already automatically hated.

As such for our purposes it's a great pic he's picking people he knows he can trust considering that we're dealing with a low trust situation.

For example when the FBI went after the mob they picked people who were not good people make no mistake they had problems of their own many problems many illegal problems. But this made them all the more loyal because one thing that the mob liked to do and was very good at doing was buying disloyalty.

Do you recognize this perspective to be valid do you recognize this perspective to be true can an unseen eye see the truth I don't think so hence why I didn't say it then.

So then I ask again how do you think this plays out what is your game plan here or you just flailing and hoping to God something hits because you don't actually understand any of us. Me least of all because I'm the grass that bends the other way even within this community and others. I'm a good old-fashioned freak in politics who kind of loves how the great game is played.

Or do you never plan that far ahead with anyone I want you to understand I'm going to be the toughest opponent that my kind can bring out for you because I listen to clearly and understand too much and what I get from you is a severe ignorance about the opposition because you have been taught badly how to understand your opposition your methodology is flawed

How fucking insane is U.S. politics when there are people out there defending the politicians who are stealing their tax dollars

[asterkatt]

MAJOR ISAT ACT 5 SPOILERS

(DO NOT MENTION ANYTHING PAST DORMONT PLEASE!!)

okay so. wowie. just started act 5 of ISAT and my goodness do I have some thoughts. wowie. wowzers. while I was playing I didn't really get the chance to voice my thoughts because if you've played act 5 you know there is no time to do so. you are getting hit with one emotional train after another. no time to think no time to breathe only time to suffer. but the power of doing a let's play gave me time to think while editing so I jotted down some thoughts that you're now getting. you're welcome. (these will not be coherent at all just. as a heads up. sorry in advance) okay so. first friendquest I did was Mira's (which makes sense considering she's the first one that you run into). one of the things that really stuck out to me is that she - not just now, but even pre-game - has only tolerated the teasing from everyone. She has to remind herself that they're not being mean. she has to remind herself that they're not being mean. I just... she shouldn't have to do that. and that's one of the things I love about this game - the characters are so in depth and so well written that yeah, sometimes they unintentionally hurt each other. we see it over and over and over again with Siffrin. their family will tease them, they'll brush it off, but we'll see that he never really lets go of it. I have a feeling it's the same with Mira. she's okay with Siffrin teasing her, because "it's fine, everyone does." then continuing to say that she probably just has the "kind of personality where it's easy to want to tease me"?? MIRA NO- augh. my heart breaks for her. she struggles with her identity and purpose just like. well. just like everyone else in this game actually. that's. okay. (bookmarking that realization for later). something that's really interesting about Mira's friendquest in particular is how much she seems to be projecting onto Siffrin. I feel like out of everyone, she's looking for someone who can validate her struggles the most. It goes further than looking for someone who can relate - she wants someone who can relate and tell her that everything will be okay.

so, when Siffrin says what he does, she lashes out at them. the thing I found most interesting (and heartbreaking) about how she responds is that she isn't just putting Siffrin down - she's putting herself down at the same time. I'd even argue that she's calling herself out with her line of "always talking as if you're better than me! as if you know me!" because I feel like she struggles with not knowing who she is either. after all, who is she if she can't change in the way that her belief as a housemaiden calls her to??

and of course, this is all solidified in what she says next: "you're just as lost and useless as I am!!!"

because yeah. Mirabelle. Mirabelle. feels lost and useless. she doesn't know who she is if she can't follow the change belief in the way that is required of her. she doesn't know why the head housemaiden burdened her blessed her. she doesn't feel like she's capable. she wasn't able to stop the King before, how is she supposed to do it now?? she overthinks and worries about everything and I'm sure that includes all the choices she makes. I'm sure she's had doubts about all of her family members in one way or another - but she's chosen to trust them. to trust them to help her on this impossible, hopeless, last chance quest. and Siffrin just made it clear that she was wrong to do so.

watch me collapse into a inconsolable heap on the floor because of this game

[greenerteacups]

Apologies if you have answered that question before but, since you mentioned Bill and Fleur in one of your last posts, I wanted to ask what you think about their relationship? They've always been one of my favorite canon ships but a recent reread hasn't been too kind to it — the age difference (which i somehow never really clocked) + Bill not really saying/doing anything to defend Fleur. Plus just leaving her stranded with his family in their cottage lmao, though that may be a side-effect of Rowling going very stereotypical with her couples once they settle down (why wouldn't Fleur be working?!). Long story short, I've been loving the two (and Fleur especially, SHE IS NO ONE'S ORNAMENT DAMN RIGHT) in Lionheart ("Apparently I'll answer to 'tall Englishman'", Bill getting his ass handed to him by a petite Frenchwoman — my beloveds) but would love to hear more of your perspective! :)

CANON BILLFLEUR i love... secret age gap coworkers to lovers to monsterfuckers arc... beautiful French academic decathlon finalist (and honorary cringefail girlboss, though that's not really her fault on account of having tried to play honestly in the Faculty Cheating Competition), descended from a race of hypnotically gorgeous man-eating sirens, falls in love with long-haired sexually ambiguous wizard indiana jones. while they're coworkers. at a bank. then Wizard Indiana Jones (who wears an earring btw) gets bit by a werewolf and becomes NOT an actual werewolf but like. the diet Y/A Teen Wolf sexyman with hunky scars. molly's sobbing over losing his good looks meanwhile fleur is sitting there desperately resisting the urge to punch the air and do a victory lap.

their love story is also hilarious. bill has about 4 lines in the entire series and somehow pulls the hottest girl in the book. king of shutting the fuck up. a parable for all of us. fleur? even better. molly straight-up calls fleur shallow to her face at her fiance's hospital bedside and she basically hits her with "chill out, he was already punching." the absolute panache. it tells us so much about their relationship even though we don't get to see it. fleur has that man HANDLED. she is not worried. we don't know what their sex life is like but babygirl WAS NOT CONCERNED about him getting "aggressive at certain times of the month." stone cold pokerface did not break a sweat. make of that what you will.

more seriously. the 17/25 age gap thing is not like, great. but also it's not terrible for me considering (a) age gaps in the wizarding world are kinda fucked anyway and (b) she's fully the hottest woman to ever exist. and bill is a smart practical dude who if he's anything like his father is ass over teakettle in love with his wife. if anything i think fleur probably ran point on that particular mission. like, from bill's perspective, you're a competent and respected guy at the office, you're known for being smart and capable, and you're just getting to the point where you're up for serious promotions. and then there's the new girl at the office, who's a freshly legal blonde frenchwoman, and she's also ridiculous looney-tunes level hot. if you so much as smile at her your office buddies are going to roast you to hell. you will never live it down. and meanwhile fleur is coming into this new office, and the only guy she even kind of knows is the older brother of harry potter's best friend, who she interacted with for 0.1 seconds a year ago. but he's also cool and competent and everybody respects him. in her mind, he is a prey animal. he is the gazelle to her cheetah on the savannah. she is stalking him like big game. once she gets over how much he pisses her the fuck off I think she engages in emotional terrorism until he caves and asks her out. as is her right as a frenchwoman <3

[nicnacsnonsense]

The thing is there really isn't similar imagery in the backgrounds. The only similarity in the backgrounds is that they both have lighthouses in them somewhere and those lighthouses look completely different.

But I do think this is maybe starting to get a little too bogged down in the imagery. A good visual parallel can absolutely cue the audience in to look for more parallels and similarities (or contrasts), but it's not actually necessary to creating a meaningful parallel (nor is it sufficient, but that's a unrelated conversation). So let's set aside the lighthouse and visual parallels for a second and look at the other points of comparison. Taking from above this are two scenes where "ed strangles a mean old white guy who’s hurt the ppl ed loves" so our three points are 1) mean old white guy, 2) hurt the people Ed loves, and 3) strangles (I know that's out of order, but this is going to flow better if I do strangles last).

Starting with mean old white guy, I don't want to leave it unremarked that there are actually a fair number of mean old white guys in this show, but that said that doesn't it can't be a meaningful point of similarity in this instance; we have to consider how being a mean old white guy relates to these two scenes. So with Izzy, Ed attacks him because Izzy is being homophobic (in that way that's also pretty misogynistic) poking at Ed's vulnerability and heartbreak and more broadly trying to police Ed's performance of masculinity. Ed attacks his dad because his dad is an abusive dick who beats his mom, which is suppose does loosely connect to Izzy's thing on the misogyny front, but it's fairly tenuous. (I am aware of the cut line where Teach Sr is mad Ed's mom made him weak but ultimately that line was cut and to my knowledge we don't know why.)

I do actually think this could be a meaningful point of connection, but sort flowing out from the parallel rather than flowing in. That is to say I don't think this is strong enough of a similarity to make a much of a case for there being a parallel here, but I think if we can find other evidence to help establish that there is a parallel between Izzy and Ed's dad, then we can use that parallel to inform us more about these characters. It could help strengthen the case that Izzy's behavior is meant to be abusive for people who won't believe that unless they see man hitting a woman or in the other direction it could help suggest that Ed's dad also policed Ed's masculinity (I absolutely do think he did that), some textual evidence to bring that cut line back into play even.

But we still need to build the case for that parallel. Next is hurt the people Ed loves. Big check on that for Teach Sr; the way it's presented is he hit Ed's mom and then Ed followed him out into the night and strangled him. He did it and it is immediately connected to what's happening in the scene. But with Izzy it's a bit more of a stretch. Not that he did it, Izzy definitely hurt Stede, tried to kill numerous times. The problem is it's not really that connected to what's happening here. Prior to Izzy getting into Ed's face, Ed's totally chill with him; there's no indication that he's bearing a grudge aout Izzy trying to kill Stede. And while Ed lashing out is immediately preceded by the mention of Ed's "boyfriend," but not in a context where Izzy is talking about having hurt Stede in the past or where Izzy is even trash talking Stede in any particular way. Rather, Izzy is putting Ed down for his feelings for Stede; he's insulting Ed for being heartbroken. So yeah, Izzy has hurt the person Ed loves, but that's not relevant to this scene, if the person Ed loves in the scenario is meant to be understood to be Stede (put a big old pin in that; we are going places in this post).

Which brings us now to the strangling. Ed choking Izzy and his dad are hugely important parts of these two scenes, enough to be the basis for argument that there is a parallel here worth further investigation all on its own. If we have the strangling we don't even need the lighthouses. (What a weird fucking sentence, lol.) The problem is the methods of choking not being similar enough actually is really important in this specific case. Because it's not as simple as Ed strangling his dad (he also kills him. And if Ed had killed Izzy, that would definitely be enough for a parallel, and also a special treat for me, but alas. Back on topic.) The most important, impactful thing in that whole sequence where Ed kills his dad is in the opening where he's telling the kraken version of the story, we get a shot of Ed's dad from the front where we can see the kraken's tentacle wrapped around his neck, strangling him, while Teach Sr grabs at it with both hands, trying to pull it away from his neck. Then later when Ed is confessing to Stede, we see the same shot again, but this time the tentacle has been replaced by a rope with Ed behind him, pulling on it. "I'm the kraken." The method Ed uses to strangle his dad is deeply embedded into the metaphor they've built. If you want to build a parallel based on the strangling, Ed's needs his metaphorical tentacle to strangle Izzy with. I don't think it needs to be a rope per se, it could be a rope or a tie or he could turn Izzy's own cravat against him or grab a string from Frenchie's lute, or pull his own sleeve down (picture with me for a moment Ed, with the pink robe falling off his shoulder as he uses his shirt sleeve to strangle Izzy. Beautiful). He just needs something.

So despite all that, and as you might have picked up on, I'm not actually opposed to the idea that maybe there is a parallel between Izzy and Ed's dad here. But to get to that, first we need to jump a head a bit. Lets go a couple scenes later to where Ed is suiting up, and then looks at his reflection and says "I'm the kraken." There is our incontrovertible call back to the scene where Ed kills his dad. That sentence is pretty particular, it's not something he's likely to say in these two different scenes by coincidence. And furthermore it connects thematically across the two scenes. The first time Ed says is he's using it as a way to confess to Stede that he is not a good person, he's a monster. And in the second instance he is declaring the same to himself as he starts to fall into his downward spiral.

Now let's follow the narrative parallel backward. In the flashbacks what caused Ed to "turn into the kraken" was killing his dad. And then after that he never killed anyone directly again, not until right before he redeclared himself the kraken when he killed Lucius (or at least he intended to kill Lucius and thought he had, which is close enough for this parallel). The parallel to Ed killing his dad then is actually when he (almost) killed Lucius. Which is not to say that I think they are trying to imply a similarity between Lucius and Ed's dad; if anything it's a parallel of contrasts where there is meaningful analysis to be done in unpacking what the significance is in the two people he killed being so different, but that is beyond the scope of this meta, which is already too scopeful for its own good.

Now let's move back in time even further. The (attempted) murders were what pushed Ed over the edge into becoming the kraken, but what was it that pushed him to that edge? In the flashback it's the scene where Ed watches his father his father abuse his mother. In the present, its this scene that we started with, where Izzy confrints Ed. Boom, there's your Izzy-Ed's dad parallel. Its not to the scene where Ed is strangling the abusive dick, its to the scene where he's being an abuser. And now you can go back to all those comparisons I said you could draw if we could prove the parallel and plug those in.

And also, let's go back to the pin I put in the idea of Izzy hurting the person Ed loves. If the parallel is to the scene where Ed strangles his dad, then the part where Izzy hurts someone Ed loves has to have happened before this scene. But if this is paralleling the abuse scene, then Izzy should be hurting the person Ed loves in this scene. It's Edward. That soft vulnerable part of himself, that's the person who Ed loves that's paralleling his mother. Bring that cut line back, Ed's dad accused his mother of making Ed weak, and now that "weak" side of him is paralleling his mother.

And if we have Izzy paralleling Ed's dad and Ed is paralleling his own mother, then we're creating a parallel in Ed and Izzy's relationship to a married couple. Which ties perfectly into the fact that this episode also has Ed and Izzy paralleling Stede and Mary. (Another parallel of contrasts in that case. They're perpendicularing them?)

And I know maybe it sounds weird that I was pushing back against the other two scenes not being similar enough, when these scenes aren't seemingly that much more similar. And I can pick out the specific details to argue the case like was done with the other two scenes. The one scene being in Ed's home and the other in Stede's quarters which Ed was trying to make into a home with the abuse violating what should have been a safe space. The thrown plate to the torn and crumpled page and thrown book. The disgust at being presented with "slop" and the disgust at "whatever it is you've become". The storming out at the end of the scene. And there is definitely something very very about comparing the violence of Ed's dad backhanding his mom and the violence of Izzy stroking Ed's cheek. But really the point I want to make here is it's not in the random details you can point to as similar if you look at them right. Its about thematically, narratively what are these scenes doing, and that's where I think these two have the stronger parallel.

So I’m up to episode 10 of my most recent rewatch and I noticed something interesting in the scene where Izzy confronts Ed. At the beginning of the conversation the camera tends to stay with Ed in the left side of the frame and Izzy on the right, with the space between them in center. We do get some shots of just Ed where he’s in center (not included) but any shots that focus on Izzy still keep Ed in the frame with Izzy staying right of center.

So I am not a cinematographer by any stretch, but this seems all pretty straight forward to me? Like, we’ve got these two people having an argument so we’re showing them on literal opposite sides, and our shots are biasing toward whoever is speaking at the moment, but with an overall bias toward Ed, who we’re supposed to sympathize with.

But where it gets interesting is when Izzy makes his namby-pamby comment, and Ed pushes Izzy up against the wall. Izzy is still right of center, but take a closer look at what is now in the center of the frame.

The lighthouse painting. The lighthouse which represents both Stede and Stede & Ed together. In this moment while Ed briefly appears to have control of the conversation, this painting representing many of the things Ed wants and wants to be is prominently in the shot even while we’re supposed to be focused on Izzy. And as an added bonus just as Ed is consistently on the left side of the frame in this argument, the lighthouse is on the left side of the painting.

But then Izzy takes back control over the conversation. He reaches out and strokes Ed’s face, causing Ed to jerk back and let go of Izzy.

Izzy takes advantage of this to step closer to Ed, bringing him to center frame.

And even then he continues to get closer and closer.

And as Izzy whispers his threat to Ed we’re left with this: Izzy filling the center of the frame, with Ed only barely visible at the very edge, and the lighthouse missing from the painting, completely blocked out by Izzy.

[arachnixe]

vigor mortis is my favorite stories of all times, only thing that's managed to locked me into a binge read in years and yeah you're right, the ending had me crying. looking forward to your thoughts on bioshifter, i still haven't finished it myself (why is it so hard to pick things back up >.>)

Bioshifter didn't resonate with me quite as much as Vigor Mortis—which is perhaps surprising given the whole spider thing—but that's not a slight against it. Vigor Mortis just hit some very specific themes I adore with laser precision.

Having now finished Hive Minds Give Good Hugs, it's easy to see a thematic throughline of "trying to do the right thing" and how it both connects with and is separate from the concept of ones "humanity." Both VM and HMGGH seem to take very similar approaches to that specific theme, but...without going into specifics, Bioshifter veers hard off the course charted by the other two. I actually think it has an even stronger ending than Vigor Mortis, which is impressive considering how well VM really sticks its landing. One of the things I like about it is that it doesn't wrap everything up in quite so tidy a bow, and it has a wildly different conclusion.

Also Sela might actually be my very favorite take on the "killer robot with contempt for flesh-beings" trope, especially with her role in the climax. Genuinely, the way that whole thing plays out is delightful.

[my-jokes-are-my-armour]

So here I am again with my gray review/analysis of The Sirens of the Deep. As always, I don't give netflix adaptations of the witcher all the praises, but I can't go without explanations either. I won't put empty critics to light up the fires of already convinced people that this is just crap. Maybe I am a hopeless soul but this is how it works for me 🤷🏽‍♀️.

So here is my short review first and the whole detailed thing under the cut as always.

I enjoyed it more than I thought I would because I rapidly switched my mindset, leaving the straight adaptation behind and embrassing more of the Geralt and Jaskier on an adventure vibe.

So yeah this movie doesn't have the emotional impact of the short story, especially because of the way it ends in A little Sacrifice and because the movie focused on other things than the romance, but for me, it fills some places that needed substance in S1 and gives another layer to Geralt's feelings that was lacking in the main. It also gives me some things to think about Jaskier in a way I didn't anticipate from the series perspective.

So if I take it simply as a rendition of A Little Sacrifice, it is not satisfying as such. But inside S1, it works well and it really pleased me.

Now for some quick sharp critics : Jaskier's songs are far too short. I need Joey Batey's voice in IV 😩. The animation is ok, but I don't like some aspects of low frame rate animations. The movie has inconsistencies in some aspects, and, weirdly, has some noticeable visual continuity issues. It changes a lot of characters and some dynamics which can feel weird, with the book story in head.

But. It explores a part that was only suggested in the og, giving the merpeople a visibility and a place in the story. So the POV about the conflict is not one sided. Merpeople and humans share their part of responsibility, keeping the tradition of grey stories.

Yennefer is barely here but her presence gives a part of what was missing in the series to really feel and understand Geralt's love for her in S1.

The story has changed quite a lot for Essi and Jaskier but it gives some interesting things to think about, if you place it in relation to the main series and not the book. Then - and this is more like in the book here - things reflects on Geralt with a mirroring effect, which I found well done overall.

And the most satisfying thing for me was basically Geralt and Jaskier together, giving something in between to book and the series. The geraskier being actual bros is present in a lot of little things, but didn't play it as intimate as in the book - maybe they were too afraid to slide on a weird angle 😅 - but man at the end 😳, I took a geraskier shower by proxy and I was not ready for that 🤣.

That said. I will give Sirens of the Deep a 7.5/10. It is a good filler to the series and I had a good time. For a pure adaptation of the book point of view, I will give more of a 6/10 as it deviates a lot and misses the emotional part.

Now, I will detail everything and spoil a lot, under the cut. You've been warned.

First thing first.

Everyone is entitled to appreciate a product or not, to have some knowledge of the source material or not, to prefer the games to the books to the series etc. I have read mild to bad receptions to the movie with valid rejections. I have no problem with that.

As always, that's the blind and simply hateful comments I am against. I read things like they dumbed down every female characters so Yennefer would be superior or the opposite classical like Geralt isn't even in the center of this feminist horrible product. I read things like this is stupid that the story was mixed with A Little Mermaid. Or they didn't read the story. They didn't respect the source material and then say the fights were the best part.

To be fair, for Sirens of the Deep, that last statement can be very true considering the angle with which they approached the story ! (You didn't anticipate me saying that right lool). But if you think they didn't respect the source material I wonder how the fights were the best to you 😅.

Anyway, yes they did read and there is still a lot from the story in it. The problem is that this story is attached to strong emotional elements to which most of us have responded reading it. And memory is selective. We kept mostly that and not the rest.

So when the adaptation picks a lot more of the other things, changes what was not very nice, and build something over the little pieces we don't remember that instead of giving us what we hoped, there is deception at the end of the road.

What I want to do here is to be a little bit more objective. Because I did enjoy the movie, but I realise that this is just because my mind switched perspective very early on while I was watching.

Let's begin with the obvious.

Adaptation of an adaptation :

In my opinion : Is this movie the perfect adaptation of A Little Sacrifice ? Hell no. That story broke my heart so bad and I can't forget that. We are not near that with this adaptation. But if you consider it taking place in S1 and having for setup that story, it has its qualities. So of course liberties have been taken. Of course it doesn't reflect all that made A little Sacrifice so good. But at the same time it goes in interesting places and adds some layers that were lacking on Geralt from the series. And that is what I enjoyed a lot.

I have some issues with the critic about the injection of A Little Mermaid in the story, because : A Little Sacrifice IS already an adaptation of The Little Mermaid tale.

It also has elements of the Ys legend attached to it.

This is a melting pot made into a total new story to satisfy the growth of Geralt's character concerning his feelings.

So can we really be mad that the adaptation of the adaptation takes the same references and reinjected them in their own way ? We can but I am not.

As a reminder, The Little Mermaid is a Danish fairy tale and Ys is a french one based on celtic myths. Those two stories have many adaptations through the centuries. And every one of them takes what they want from it and uses the myths like they want. This is for the 100% slavik ref argument...

I am pretty sure everyone that read the short story can make the link with The Little Mermaid. I mean. There is a mermaid. There is a love story. She ends up with legs. But did you remember things about Ys ?

Here is one ref to Ys from the book : “Because they are steps,” Dandelion whispered in awe. “Ooo, they’re steps leading to an underwater city. To the legendary Ys, which was swallowed up by the sea. Have you heard the legend of the city of the chasm, about Ys-Beneath-The-Waves? I shall write such a ballad the competition won’t know what’s hit them. I have to see it up close… Look, there’s some kind of mosaic, something is engraved or carved there… Some kind of writing? Move away, Geralt.”

And here is a direct ref from the movie : The sirens Queen's name is Dahut, who is the main character around this legend. And the place of the royal mermaids in the movie is like a sunken city.

For me, the movie created the merpeople civilisation based on several references like the first one I gave. The short story doesn't show much of the merpeople, except Sh’eenaz and some fishmen. But they clearly took things from the dialogues mostly. Geralt and Jaskier exploring and talking about those creatures and their possible civilisation. They took also from The Little Mermaid, the Disney version, but a slightly more darker tone but not enough. I understand that THIS can feel bad.

But then, I invite you to revisit the Andersen tale. Sure Disney is all sugar and ice caking compare to the og 😅, but, look at the A Little Sacrifice's version and see that it is also not as dark as the original for the part it takes of : the mermaid and the Duke actually love each other and there is a "happy" ending to that part of the story. But you will see also how drastically different this adaptation is from the two others. Because well... Adaptations, especially from old tales, are rarely the replica of the original. Because it depends a lot on the narrator.

Then ask yourself what one wants to tell when they adapt a story ? What are the thematics explored ? Where and when does it fit ? What is the focus and the purpose ?

For me, here, the focus was to make it blend into the series universe, while adapting the mermaid part in a nicer way. Because let's be honest. Buying the fact that Sh’eenaz is actually loving Agloval so she accepts the sacrifice is quite a stretch of imagination lol. To me, the Duke feels more like a zoophile in the end ^^'.

Smoothing Agloval :

This is one of the change that I liked the most in the movie. Because they didn't make him perfect. He is genuine about his feeling but he is selfish too. The og duke is more deported on his father in an actually good way.

Just for a reminder. This is Agloval. “An intelligent race,” Agloval repeated pensively, resting an elbow on the armrest, and his fist on his chin. “An underwater civilisation. Fishlike people living on the seabed. Steps leading to the depths. Geralt, you take me for a bloody gullible duke.” Zelest proposal to kill all the creatures [...]"From what the Witcher says, they are some kind of sea drowners or other sea monsters. There are ways of dealing with drowners. I heard tell that one sorcerer gave some drowners short shrift in Lake Mokva. He poured a small barrel of magical philtre into the water and did for the fuckers. Didn’t leave a trace.’’[...] And Agloval's response to that "Thank you for that excellent suggestion, Zelest. Do you have any more?" And later... "You are mistaken, Miss Daven,” Agloval said calmly. ‘We shall learn whither lead those steps. Further, we shall descend those steps. We shall find out what is on that side of the ocean, if there is anything there at all. And we shall draw from the ocean everything we can. And if not we, then our grandsons will do it, or our grandsons’ grandsons. It is just a matter of time.[...]”

And just after that, when Agloval promises to exploit the sea till nothing is left, Sh’eenaz appears and she has made the sacrifice to bring peace and consume her relation with the Duke.

To him, the "love of his life" isn't even from an intelligent race, and he promised to go where he should not, destroy their habitat for profit because he is upset. (All similarity with anything is unintentional of course 🙄)

In the movie, they moved the centre of the dark part on something else. There is some racist undertone but less present. The merpeople and the humans know each others well and have a status quo situation going on. The start of the conflict for the merpeople is that the humans takes too much from the sea, just for the pearls economy. So the status quo is in balance because they are beginning to starve. So there is the greedy aspect of course from the humans, but the catalyser of the conflict is because the King don't accept the romance between his son and Sh'eenaz. He wants the succession of his lineage assured and this romance goes against it.

He goes great length to break that union, even making an alliance with Melusina who has her own motives to break to merpeople royal family.

The obstacles that Agloval and Sh'eenaz have to overcome makes their relationship truer.

One major change is that the movie reversed the sacrifice. Agloval proves his love and counters his father's actions against the merpeople, becoming the link between the land and sea, changing into a mermaid. The peace is very fragile but the love part is somehow more coherent.

The real problem maybe is that all of that takes almost all the light from the love story that was in the centre of A Little Sacrifice : Geralt and Essi. But I feel that a part of what was only about that in conversations, inner dialogs etc has been used in mirroring narrations.

"Just because you and your accursed lover only have two modes doesn't mean everyone else does"

Essi isn't the only mirror for Geralt's feelings toward Yennefer in this movie. I don't feel this is a bad thing on a strict narration point of view, but from an adaptation eye with this being one of the focal point of people love for the short story, this is a bad faux pas, because it made this part feel more generic.

So here are my analysis of the mirroring things.

They chose to illustrate several iteration of love stories. Each one reflecting on others and mostly Geralt's situation with Yennefer in the end. This is highlight several little things from the main series, like blood family vs chosen/found family and heritage. It also gives something back in between episode 5 and 6 of the main series : how Geralt feels about love in regard of his own situation.

The king and his two "loves"

Agloval is the legitimate heir of the King who tells him that he loved his mother from true love. Zelest is the illegitimate son but he has strangely a strong position in the court. Usually "bastard" are hidden if not killed. We can suppose that he lied, because he lies on a lot of things just to get what he wants.

He tries to convince his son that true love is not enough. And in the end even tell Zelest that he is an error he always wanted to erase.

The King put the interest before the sentiments, and even before the life of his own people. He doesn't care if people dies if he can stop the union of his son with the mermaid.

Melusina and the injustice

The relation of the King of Bremervoord with love is reflected on Melusina with whom he plots. And the sea witch is similar to Yennefer in several aspect. Even Jaskier is jokingly comparing them.

She is powerful, quite angry. She is sterile. Her colour is violet. 😏

She lost her true love against the need of the royal family to have an heir. Things are not really sure about the real love of the mer-king. He seems quite embarrassed. But Melusina wants her true love back even if she has to kill every one for that.

S1 Yennefer is in this kind of destructive path to get what she wants. She doesn't care much if she hurts people in her quest. Even Geralt. They share the passion and the she goes.

Agloval and Sh’eenaz

They have a major issue on communication (well that's no well played with the issues with the use of the merspeak). They are ok when there is only sex between them. But the manipulation of the people they trust renforce the problem to a breakup. In the end this is the action that proves the sincerity of the feelings.

And this reflects on Geralt love relations. He has a hard time communicate with those he loves in general. He doesn't understand why Yennefer keeps abandoning him. There is sex and passion but the rest is silent. And we have Jaskier that hates the sorceress and tries to force him out of this relation because he thinks she is not made for him. I think I have never seen Jaskier slaging off Yennefer as much than in this movie lool

And then when the spark appears between Geralt and Essi, he tries to push for that relation to blossom. The communication in the end is what resolve everything for them.

Which leads to.

Geralt's feelings and Essi

in the books, Geralt's struggles with his place in the world and his feelings are the biggest underlying subject in the short stories.

Geralt has a complexe toward his capacity to feel emotions and be entitled to love or being loved. He thinks of himself as a monster and not deserving those things. And we have a Jaskier in counter telling him he should not depreciate himself and go for it.

Here the approach to those things feels less miserable but he always tries to justify that he is different and not worth it. He acknowledge he has feelings though. His main excuse is : I am a witcher. Aka a killing machine making money hunting monsters and I never knew love in my life.

He has an intense relation with Yennefer but full of turmoils. He doesn't feel enough for her (a shard of ice) and in the series there the accent is more on understanding her and her needs.

When he meets Essi and have this love at first sight experience, he is troubled. Geralt is not feeling good enough to match the complexity of her feelings. And the whole discovery of her personality, the differences in the feelings he experiences for her and Yennefer, leads to touching moments, even emotional ones. We have some good conversations with Jaskier also.

But there is a little something that might have slide off you mind... 🚩

Description of Essi The woman could not have been older than eighteen, and was very slim. Her long, luxuriant hair was the colour of dark gold. They entered as the girl finished the song and thanked the audience for the thunderous applause with a nod of her head, which shook her hair gently.

Yes. Even if this looks like less than 18 but maybe isn't, Essi is way younger than Geralt and there is the possibility that she is not even an full adult. So yeah, there is a innocence and a freshness in her that makes the romance special. But in reality this is kind of creepy. Especially when we have Jaskier being pissed of by their mannerisms and the way they turn around each other without going anywhere who suggests that they fuck to settle it for good.

So...

They decided to age Essi. She is now a mature woman, around the age of Jaskier (as they know each other since childhood in the new headcanon). So she is something like 35/40, placing the story just before The Moutain.

And I say yes ! Thank you ! This is a nice change ! Geralt isn't fucking a teenager. Jaskier isn't pushing for his friend to have sex with a teenager either !

And Essi still got a softness to her, some strong temper too. She is still romantic. She is still infatuated with Geralt.

And those who claim that she is like the women Marie Sues all power that need no men ever, this is not true. Essi is stronger than Jaskier as a child, she is self assured, but Geralt is still her hero here. He saves her life twice. Same thing with Sh’eenaz. She needs others help. This is not because a woman can be brave that she is a Marie Sue or that she eclipses men's valor.

Like in the short story, this love story doesn't work. The reasons are not exactly the same though. Here, Geralt's life and heart are too hard for her and she wants a more normal life : have a family, peace and security.

Note that in S2, this is basically the dream of Yennefer too. Parallels. Parallels...

And note again that Essi tells to Geralt that Jaskier will do what she cannot ! The subtext sent me howling in geraskier there loool.

I was satisfied with their relationship even if we didn't have all the subtleties of Geralt's struggles. But we had more than we had in S1.

What we don't have is the strong emotional connection and the punch in the guts that is the real ending. I don't feel like this was necessary in this movie, it would probably have fallen flat in the circumstances. But I wish that somehow this tragedy is adressed in a way or another. Whump the bard lool.

Geralt and Jaskier

This was the most rewarding thing of the whole show for me. Just having Geralt actually caring for Jaskier and showing it was everything. Just the two of them being buddies, I could have that forever.

Jaskier is a little bit too buffoon because he is used 90% as the comic relief, but he lands right in the middle in his charactisation between the books and the series.

The geraskier subtext is running wild in my mind. Geralt is like "you annoying little shit" but then his reaction to Zelest is so "you touch him I kill you". Jaskier seems less infatuated but then you have some parallels with Essi's feelings that are just too straight : "your bard loves you and he is the one you need".

I won't say much more here or I will just enumerate very frame they share on screen because I loved them together being friends !!

The big character changes and other additions

i have already mentioned a lot of changes so i won't repeat too much here. This is more so comments I aant to make on the changes from the short story.

Agloval, Jaskier and Essi are those who have changed the most from the og and new connections have been made to change the dynamics with other secondary characters that have been changed also or added. I understand this could feel odd with the short story in head.

I spoke already a lot about Agloval and the vhanges around him, but i want to point another change that is linked to him and Jaskier now.

Zelest.

He was the supervisor of the pearl fishing. Here he is the king's illegitimate son, military counsellor and Jaskier's bully from the past. He's got a bit of a Faramir in some aspects here, searching for the approval of his father. He is also trying to be a better son than the legitimate one. He has a need to belong. He was channeling his of antipathic and violent persona for a while and I like the nuances it added to some characters.

Zelest leads to Jaskier and his new headcanon - which is strangely plausible, in the series verse and for some part compatible with the book character. Not for everything but still. So I was : ok I am listening here.

He leads also to a little bit of bi Jaskier. I mean you can't convince me that if he wasn't killed by the Kraken they wouldn't have made up in the end loool.

But his change of heart doesn't feel right. It just had drama to the situation of the kingdom in the end as the kind lost his two sons. But there are not much of an emotional impact.

Melusina and Sh’eenaz

Melusina is clearly a disney character here. She is half Ursula and Scar and she even has a muscial number like in the Disney adaptation (which is both weird and nice). Weird because this isn't the kind of things you can think of in a witcher rendition. The music isn't used as a number, it has a reality in the world. But honestly I like the song lol. So I put that in my little category of, I keep that to the side.

Her character as the grand villain why not. But the use of the kraken is both wrong to the short story and feels to much like Disney. Basically it is mentioned in the story but this isn't what caused the deaths of the fisher in their conclusion.

“And the monster that killed the pearl divers? You have no idea what it was?” “A kraken, perhaps?” “No. A kraken would have wrecked the boat, but it was intact. And, as they said, totally full of blood,” Little Eye swallowed and visibly paled. “Don’t think I’m being a know-all. I grew up by the sea, and I’ve seen a few things.”

Sh’eenaz has a lot more characteristics that in the book. She is can use magic apparently and her mother too. Well considering auty Melusina is a witch, why not. This this for me participates more to the massive fight at the end than to a real improvement of the character. I appreciated that we learn a bit about the merpeople through her though.

The political and economical situation :

They developed that part beyond the witcher story, giving the merpeople an existence. What differs the most here is that the humans are well aware of the existence of a sea civilization and that there are already some links between them with a status quo that is falling apart.

In the original story we just understand that the pearl divers are going too far and perturbs the merpeople. And Agloval is willing to destroy the environment out of anger and greed. Sh’eenaz makes the sacrifice that stabilises the situation but we don't have much of what is happening under the sea. So with all the addition in the movie, we have a grayer plot. Sure we have the real monsters are the humans. But here we also have a monster monster. And both monsters plotted together. Which is an interesting twist.

Merspeak :

One thing that was not well handled in the relation between the merpeople and land people was the merspeak. This is one of the least coherent things of the whole story.

In the book, Agloval needs Geralt and Geralt is helped by Essi at some to communicate with Sh’eenaz. And Sh’eenaz doesn't seem to understand common human language too. Everything is handled in English (or whatever language you read the story in). But here they actually created the language. The ideas are not bad but this is delivered very badly.

It falls apart in several moments.

First, as the sea and the land have a status quo, it is implied that both species communicate. We have a Vodnik speaking common language with Geralt and we have Agloval and Sh’eenaz arguing in their own language but apparently understanding each other. So yeah, nothing is coherent there and it is a big miss.

The war :

This is the part of the story that isn't featured at all in the book. This is a menace. But here they went full on it. This is one of the aspects that I wasn't really on board with. It has some cool elements but here if you want weird deviations on the source material, there are plenty.

First and this is not the worst to me because they didn't go too far with it and it was fun : Jaskier with a sword. This makes no sense and even he says basically wtf am I supposed to do ? But he mostly blocks the attacks and lets someone else kill the monsters. So ok, why not. Let the bard have some moments of fun.

One canon thing though: Jaskier headbutt 😅.

Now my main problem with the fights concerns Geralt.

I have switched off my brain to enjoy it because this was too much 🤣. Geralt is a mutant with more strength than a human and high speed reflexes but he doesn't fly or do flips like an olympic gymnast - even game geralt isn't that flexible 😅 - or break metal chains by flexing lol. I had circus music in my head during all the fights hehehe.

But more importantly what the fuck was that with the magic signs and the potions. The potions were badly used and the signs were like full magic.

If you loved the fights, good on you, but don't come to tell me they were canon 😅.

But you know what ? They went full gear for the spectacular, so let's enjoy it for what it is. No more no less.

One last thing I want to talk about and that I found well done, because it links book Jaskier to the series one and it highlights one big things about the witcher books in general.

Jaskier lies - The unreliable narrator

This is one big thing of the books. The story is given to us through the lens of several unreliable narrator and we discover in the later books that Jaskier could be the main for the Continent history.

In the books it is stated that Jaskier lies a lot especially in his art. Series Jaskier is set up also like that but this is not really a big deal.

In this movie, they threw Jaskier right in the center of the unreliable narrator.

From Essi and Geralt conversation on the balcony at the party, we have a right in the middle book and series Jaskier vibe. He exaggerated Geralt achievements, changed the events, but we understand the truth beneath.

But we learn that our boy lied about his past and built himself a story to feat his persona. And we know Jaskier lies and embellishes things a lot. In this story, they emphasise on that : he lied about his past. He lies in his songs. And the next thing he does : He sings about erasing things he doesn't like. (My story).

We have a glimpse of him being bullied, but we also have Essi saying to Geralt that he went through a lot. Jaskier wanted to erase the pain is a strong feature. This could be a strong way to end in S5, for his character (and Ciri's too).

The ending of A Little Sacrifice is him muting forever the fact that Essi died and the story attached to her. Jaskier is very vocal and noisy, but he is silent when he is in real pain.

And there is actually one thing in A little Sacrifice that can concur with the fact that he could be not an Oxenfurt academy's elite member as he claims : the fact that he mocks Yennefer's explanation of the tides, while he is supposed to have mastered Astronomy too (one of the 7 liberal arts).

“I think you’re a fool. Yennefer once told me that the moon causes the tides.”

Dandelion cackled.

“What bloody rubbish! What does the moon have to do with the sea? Only dogs howl at the moon. She was having you on, Geralt, that little liar of yours, she put one over on you. Not for the first time either, I’d say.”

I am not fully on board on the new headcanon but I like the narrator aspect.

Conclusion

What was missing (or not) :

The pearl for Essi. The tragic ending. Because these were iconic. But in this version I am not sure this was really necessary to have that. I wish that at some point we have a mention of Essi's death and how it affects Jaskier…

The og geraskier moments. But… I mean… if we had them as they were written, the fandom would have explode in rainbows 😅. Let's take only Geralt and Jaskier sharing a bed, talking about love 🤭. But if you read between the lines, in the end, you have your full geraskier in the feels loool.

What I liked :

For me that was the strong point from all the characterisations especially Geralt. This version of Geralt felt more Geralt to me that before in the series. From his self loathing that is finally highlighted, even if it is by proxy, to his fragility towards his feelings. I needed that part of Geralt. We also have the illustration of his moral code, sense of justice and need to protect. All in one go. And it feels right.

His relationship with Jaskier feels more normal also. I was dying to have a buddies on the road feeling from them. I mean we finally had that in S3 but in this movie it feels like a salve healing S1 relationship between them.

Having Geralt being awkward at flirting is also efreshing. I like that he expresses his feelings a bit more, says how different he thinks he is and his views on humans. Love was surviving. In his experience he found it hard to trust humans. He doesn't want to fall in love with short span living humans. He feels he needs somebody more like him. Hence Yennefer.

Note for some of the angry reviews :

Geralt and Jaskier's deal for money. Geralt and Essi knowing the merspeak. Jaskier pushing for Geralt to be with Essi and drop Yennefer. Essi and Geralt having sex. If that was too predictable for some or easy trick, well I am sorry for you, this was in the short story 😅.

So yeah this Geralt is just at the junction of series Geralt and book Geralt, and that is something I greatly appreciated to most I think.

Then the absence of oversexualisation of the mermaid and overall the less pervert eye, if I can say that like that. Maybe this is not something that translate to men as much, but as much as I love A Little Sacrifice - this is my favorite short story - this is quite uncomfortable to read as a woman sometimes. Well Geralt's gaze on women is often incomfortable to be fair lool. So yeah, having less of that and more connection was a plus for me.

The changes on Agloval character and the mermaid. Their love story feels right.

Essi and Jaskier singing together, even though the set up is not the same. But it was too short 🥲. But I guess this is because I miss Joey a lot.

What I didn't like :

The fights. I won't repeat what I already said. The physicality was way over the top. But at least it was fun to watch.

Less fights and maybe we could have more of emotional build up for Essi and Geralt. A part of me believes this is the response to “the witcher is about the path and killing monster discours that runs a lot” that pushed the story in that direction. Who knows ? But if that's so, just 😩.

The chaos with the use of the merspeak. This was really confusing and narratively weird.

So :

If you take this as an pure adaptation of the short story, there are some miss points that are hard to get over. It didn't have most of the iconic moments and vibe. Nor the emotional impact.

If you take this like a filler in S1. This is really enjoyable. It connects a lot of things and gives more layers to both Geralt and Jaskier.

[homestuckreplay]

take me down to the pesterlog city where jade’s text is green and john gets all petty

(page 1394-1406)

It’s pesterlog time!!!! In a 12 page spread (1391-1402) there are seven pesterlog pages representing five characters. I feel like I am a medieval peasant attending my first palace banquet. The rich offerings of character moments and variety of colors on display is blowing my gruel-fed brain.

The art also kicks ass this update! Tbh I am going to make a post about the art more generally as I’ve noticed some big changes recently (and some slow changes that are very apparent when jumping back) so for today I’ll just say: look at this super cool art of John exploring LOWAS on page 1395. He’s so clearly questing in a way that the sprite just can’t represent. I would get this framed for my wall.

I’m delighted to get a longer conversation with CG, who I’ve named Reggie. They’re actually fun and creative with their trolling techniques here, and knowing what they look like means I get to imagine this little grey kid grinding their fangs as they tap away on their keyboard furious at a comparatively sweet and clueless guy. They look like a goofy nerd whose bark is way worse than their bite.

‘IT WOULD MAKE ME SICK TO MY HUMAN STOMACH IF I HAD ONE OF YOUR HUMAN STOMACHS’ is VERY funny. Reggie feels similar to the Felt and Midnight Crew in being so over-the-top in their violence that it loops back around to being funny. And John’s reactions are good too – he’s not upset at the trolling like Jade is, he’s hilarious and willing to turn Reggie’s snark back on them. Their willingness to play off each other definitely increases the ‘enemies to lovers’ feeling of this Valentine’s Day conversation.

It is interesting that Rose accepted GA’s offer to be friends (p.1093), and now Reggie is telling John that they’re friends in the future (p.1394). So suddenly the trolls, who act and look textbook malicious at first, are trying to play nice. Are the trolls setting this up in order to double cross the kids in the future? Or are the trolls trying to incorporate the kids into their group and get them to follow some sort of dark trolling agenda? Or are they also just outcast alien kids who troll people because they’re lonely and want some attention? Hard to say when we have only heard from three of them.

There is something amazing about PM’s sword previously being used for vengeance (p.844, 870) and this time when she tries to do similar, she’s interrupted by WV who convinces her to use it to open cans and share food instead. WV may be from the dark kingdom but he feels like a peacemaker between the light and dark sides, refusing to fight against either PM or AR. I mean he is literally followed around by the light of serenity. And now he sits between PM and AR and shares his food and Tab and they all become friends, which honestly, is amazing mayoral work. Solving disputes in the town already. I really think he could build a town just like Spades Slick did.

This view of Dave’s city is cool too, I love the color of the sky! He straight up lies by saying ‘i always keep birds in here its sort of my thing’ (p.1400) and calling it sincere, considering his earlier bird-free room (p.312). He is on way too many layers of irony to decode (i.e. he just says whatever bullshit comes to mind that might be funny with no regard for whether it’s true or false). Which is soooo great for getting to know his character (also he should stop saying slurs).

However, I can see why Dave is annoyed by Rose here. Like he does kind of bring this all on himself by being so ironic all the time and talking about how ‘cool’ his brother apparently is, but, it’s gotta be hard when he’s been telling Rose about fighting his brother on the roof and she’s dismissing that he went through a lot to get the beta to save her, when Jade had it literally handed to her. Rose doesn’t know the details so I’m not mad at her, but it still can’t be easy for Dave to hear that dismissal from a friend.

I do feel like Rose and Jade have this alliance in seeing themselves as the two who know what’s going on, with the combined power of Jade’s visions and Rose’s perceived high intelligence. This whole update is very gender roles but this does evoke page 838, where Rose is far more aware of Jade’s powers and the type of information she has access to than John or Dave are.

Meanwhile in Dave and John land...

TG: i should probably text him soon TG: see whats up TG: because TG: i love him

Straight up adorable. Don’t even pretend to me that there’s a shred of irony in this. I love how close these guys are. This is sort of the first declaration of love in Homestuck unless you count John’s telling Liv Tyler on his Armageddon poster that he loves her (p.223).

We specifically don’t get to see Rose’s conversation with a troll (yet), but I think we can assume she’s talking to GA, probably the only troll she respects enough to prioritize over Dave. We also don’t see where in the Medium Rose is; John assumes that she’s also in the Land of Wind and Shade, but according to Rose, ‘It’s hard to say for certain. But I think I like it here.’ (p.1402). If the Medium has four planets in between the light and dark (p.703) (holy shit half the story ago) then it makes sense for the players to all start on different planets and have to find each other, so we could be getting ANOTHER super aesthetically cool land within the next few weeks. Or teased repeatedly until the end of the act, who knows.

The puppets (including a wizard puppet) clinging to the totem lathe on page 1403 is a very good gag. Also, ‘eggy loking thign’ (p.240) spotted here in the menu?? Implying a limited set of Sburb entry items?? Also 2,000 starting build grist for Jade to use compared to 20 for Rose, and a bunch more gizmos and gadgets available to deploy, including a disc with a piece of green grist (?) and two devices shaped like captchalogue/strife cards; a further tease of what’s to come.

Finally, I’m so glad Hussie agrees with me that there’s no fucking way Jade knows how to clean a house. Even if she has absorbed gender roles and sees cleaning as a woman’s activity (p.1405) she definitely was not taught to do that and designed some kind of robot to do it for her.

[arowyn-m]

Omfg this. This a thousand times over—I will never understand why they so clearly set up Jayce to be Ambessa's tool for conflict at the end of S1 only to completely disregard it in S2. Yes, Caitlyn was vulnerable and hurting, but she also had zero political power or experience beyond her mom wanting her to become a politician. ((Which—sidebar—Cait becoming a major political tool also reduces Cait's desire to become a detective into a stupid phase.)) Jayce was also hurting in the aftermath, and—unlike Cait—circumstances surrounding him made Jayce more than just "available". Having him would be advantageous.

On top of that, Viktor—the only person really convicted to stand in the way of Hextech weapons—is conveniently in a coma for a few weeks, and S2's Ambessa sees no value in taking advantage of that, even though she was there in the immediate aftermath of the explosion. Even if Ambessa wasn't aware of Jayce and Viktor's closeness before, she would have seen it in Jayce's panic to save Viktor's life.

Another convenient thing to consider—it would take zero effort to make Jayce the de facto head of the Council once Mel is no longer in the equation. S1 never set up Salo as a real force to be reckoned with, so idk why they elaborated on his character any further.

So here's a summary of advantages of Ambessa making Jayce the leader of the Council over Caitlyn:

Jayce is easy as hell to manipulate

Viktor—who is Jayce's conscience/voice of reason in some respects—is conveniently out of the picture for the first few weeks—the time in which political action and decisions surrounding military force matter the most. It was never Jayce's personal conviction to keep Hextech weaponry out of the equation—he was only respecting Viktor's wishes.

Jayce is already on the Council, and the only other considerable person on the Council will be taken by the Black Rose (OR, if that doesn't happen, would still refuse to be manipulated by her mother) Salo was only ever a factor because Ambessa allowed him to be.

Jayce is one of two human beings on earth that know Hextech well enough to build Hextech weaponry from scratch. Ambessa having both the inventor of Hextech and the head of the council under her thumb in ONE would be a considerable asset.

These next points are on a meta, storytelling level but the points still stand:

Jayce being the leader of Piltover would make a hell of a lot more sense lorewise than Caitlyn assuming that role. Caitlyn was never a politician in lore—she was always the detective who was so good at her job that she rose ranks and became The Sheriff.

Viktor and Jayce's fallout would be a lot more personal if, on paper, Jayce was the one orchestrating the whole operation of making Hextech weapons. In that vein, Viktor and Jayce's hatred of each other in lore would also play out, whereas in S2 Viktor has a hazy, spiritual outlook on life (very unlike the very grounded, logical character a lot of us loved in S1) and Jayce is just sad, then later batshit crazy in act 2. For some reason the narrative flips the script on that one in Act 3, giving the "batshit crazy" to Viktor and making Jayce the fate-guided one. It's strange.

Caitlyn's arc in S1 does not at all lend itself to a dark political arc. Caitlyn's A to B in S1 was going from seeing Zaunites like the rest of Piltover does (scum, uncivilized, generally bad people, etc) to seeing Zaunites as people that need help. She then meets Jinx, who is the one Zaunite that she met that actually is a terrorist, and suddenly throws out her brain because she's so aggrieved for a mother that she was convinced hated her??? No. Caitlyn's natural next step after the events of S1 would be to be appointed as the next Sheriff by Jayce so that Cait would have all the manpower she needs to hunt JINX. I sincerely doubt the Caitlyn of S1 would have flipped on a dime and decided that all Zaunites are fine to risk in a manhunt for Jinx herself.

THIS RIGHT HERE was the juiciest, ripe-for-future-conflict season 1 dynamic imo that the season 2 writers either forgot entirely, or didn't give a single shit about.

Season 1 ends with the entire council the victim of a terrorist attack and Jayce just... hides in his lab. Being sad. He gets to care about Viktor and NOTHING ELSE for the rest of the show.

None of his other relationships matter, none of his politics matter. His desire to protect the city and improve lives with Hextech vanishes without a trace. He's given no self reflection after the mother of the child he killed comes after him for vengeance, just goes ahead and makes weapons again. Renni may as well have not said a word to him about her son. He never reacts to it.

Ambessa never tries to speak to Jayce again despite her wanting him to make Hextech weapons. Despite how easy it was for her to manipulate him to recklessness after their one(1) conversation. No, instead she hitches her horse to a worm like SALO and needlessly tries to get Jayce killed... Don't get me started again on how stupid they made Ambessa in general.

And poor Mel gets to act meek before Caitlyn of all people, gets a completely worthless shimmer subplot, and then gets whisked away to magic exposition land. And then she comes back and kills her mom. In combat. With her new magic powers.

God...

They could have let Jayce be the hapless hopeless loser forced into a position of authority he never wanted over two warring cities, ping ponged between the manipulations of two ideologically opposed political powerhouses with family drama. But nooooooo that would be too much work :(((

[000png]

will zero finally go back to school... stay tuned and find out

[egophiliac]

do skully have pokemon?

Pumpkaboo is the obvious one, but y'know, sometimes the obvious one is the right one! (we'll say SUPER SIZE Pumpkaboo, just for fun. big pumpkin for big skeleton boy.) and another person actually also suggested Greavard, which I somehow hadn't considered, but feels so perfect that I feel like I should have. dangit.

(they can also have little Nightmare Suit costumes :D)

[devilsskettle]

The X trilogy + "psycho-biddy" influences

[ancha-aus]

RealAgeAU Drabble - Session Zero

Hello! I am back! @spotaus get in here friend! Next drabble just dropped!

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Okay. Before anyhting else. This is in the first spring the guys are in farmtale. Nightmare has been six for almost a year now, like 11 months ish. So the gang has been in Farmtale for like 8 months ish (they have had night with them for 10 months)

Look. You all agreed to this timeline hopping when you started reading my drabbles. I have warned you all at the beginning of this ride. ANYWAY! We going in!

*-------------------------*

Ngihtmare stares up at the building as he keeps a very tight hold on Dust's shirt. Dust still has him in his arms as he calmly waits by the enterance.

Killer had dropped them off for now and was going to park the car while they waited under the little covering by the front door.

Dust nuzzles his skull softly "Hey... it is just for a little while. And I shouldn't be long."

Nightmare just pushes closer to Dust "Why need to even go here? It is stupid. You teach me stuff."

Dust nods "Oh trust me. I agree. I am perfectly able to teach things." Dust looks unhappy as well.

Fauna, the nice deer monster from their town, laughs softly "But unless you actually get registered you aren't allowed to do that."

Dust huffs and Nightmare looks at her "So? Why do i need to go here?" Nightmare could just take a break while Dust gets the stupid license to home school and then they can pick it up again. Dust already said they aren't ina hurry.

Fauna smiles softly "This is also to see how you are doing mentally Nightmare. A lot has happened and your health is important."

Ngihtmare just pushes clsoer ot Dust "I am fine." he is fine. He has his... his four! He has a home and peolpe who care about him. What else could he want? Sure his body aches and if he moves a lot it still hurts... and when he is alone at night the nightmares return. But that is beside the point!

He is happier and safer than he has been for a long time. How can they just not see that?

Fauna smiles softly "Well you have been healing a lot. but this is a good thing! you will get to learn so many things, and they will figure out where you are with your schooling to help you better focus and see where you can learn things. Not to forget other children to play with."

Nightmare freezes at the implication of other children and looks up at Dust begging. Please. Please don't leave him.

Dust nuzzles his skull and mutters softly "I will stay right by your side."

Fauna is clearly about to say something but then Killer rushes unver the cover and pants as he drips water "This rain!! It gets everywhere!"

Dust shoots him a disapproving look "really?"

Killer grins "Had to walk quite the end to get here. No parking places. Well! Lets get this whole mental evaluation over with!" and he marches in. Dust shrugs and follows him.

They check in with the receptionist as Nightmare keeps his skull against Dust's collarbone. He watches as he stays quiet to try and listen. file away eveyrhting he hears and keep an eye on where the exit is. Just in case.

They get to the right room and meet some people inside. The director Augustus and the head teacher Miss March.

They talk for a while and Nightmare just keeps trying to stay plastered against Dust. He knows it is dumb and needy and clingy and he shouldn't be this weak after all he experienced but he is terrified and Dust is safe.

They do the stupid tests and talk and they just keep asking him questions he doens't want or know how to answer.

Then they have lunch and all Nightmae wants to do is go home and sleep in their bed.lay together with his dad- four! His four! and relax. let today pass and never think about it again.

They have a few more talks before they meet up with Augustus again and he smiles at them "I must say i am relieved."

Killer looksup and shoots Dust a look as well.

Dust frowns and Ngihtmare feels hismelf be pulled closer "about what?"

Augustus blinks and chuckles "I am sorry. I didn't mean it in any negative way. It is just. I read the file you put together with miss Fauna and I had been worried. but. It seems like your son is a very strong and brave young man."

Nightmare is unsure how to react and just pushes closer to Dust. He knows it is part of the story that Dust is his biological dad but they joy at hearing that bond being refered between them? It is a lot.

Augustus sighs "There is trauma. that is obvious. However. He speaks for himself. and while scared he just needs some gentle encouragement from either of you to feel reassured. The ability for him to still form these meaningfull and supportive bonds with others really showcases that he is on the right track to heal."

He pulls over another report "The physical health is also healing. Very slowly but with the slow recovery of his own magic it is to be expected and all well within the realm of normal healing."

he sighs as he looks at them "Now... about his schooling. He is a smart kid. Very far with reading and languages. But the other aspects of his schooling are very lacking at the moment. but nothing that can't be caught up with." Augustus waits a moment before continuing "Normally. I would recommend full days here."

Killer hisses and glares "No." Nightmare shrinks closer to Dust as Dust just pulls him closer again.

Augustus nods "I had already assumed that would be your answer." he smiles "I will still have to try. I assure you he will be safe here. We have a top staff that all work together to ensure the safety of the children. We are specialised in offering help for children of bad situations. TO help them heal and experience the things any child should get the chance to experience."

Dust glares "He doesn't want to."

Augustus nods "of coruse he doesn't. It is new and scary. It is away from those who keep him safe. But it would help him grow. help him heal. see that not eveyrone in this world is out to hurt him. that those who hurt him were the outliners and should never have gotten the chance to see him."

Dust frowns as Killer jsut glares "We are not leaving him here for days on end."

Augustus nods "While we recommend the full program we can always do a shorter one. One that focusses on trying to help him catch up wiht his learnign and to just keep an eye in case his mental health degrades." he pulls over another piece of paper and hands it to Killer.

Killer snatches it and reads it.

Augustus speaks calmly "It is half a day a week. Normally for children who spend a long time in a hospital. It will mean that he two hours of private tutoring and after that he would spend an hour with the class before and another hour after lunch." he smiles "a much more gentle introduction to school and being near others."

Killer and dust share a look.

Killer leans closer "And how long would this all take? Seeing as we are planning on home schooling him again as soon as Dust got his license."

Augustus looks thoguhtful "Catching up with the school work will take a long time. mentally healing fuly even longer. But as you are not planning on using the full program we can at least give him a stable start to continue healing from."

Fauna frowns at them "What if it turns out that he likes classes? that he likes being in a group?"

Nightmare shakes his skull as he pushes closer to Dust.

Dust rubs his spine softly and Ngihtmare feels hismefl relax. Killer speaks with a grin "If. and only IF Nightmare says he prefers group classes and stuff. Then we will look into options."

Dust nods as he keeps holding him "It will be a long process. We will need to make sure the people he is near know not to touch him. THe children will have to know to be gentle. Nightmare will have to rest a lot and if anything happens with his magic we would have to be called." Dust looks pointedly at Augustus and Nightmare sees the other shiver under the intimidating glare.

Dust just keeps staring "Which is just the start of the list."

Killer grins and the tension disappears "Which is why one of us will remain nearby just in case!"

Augustus frowns "That would go against the aim of the project to help him build up his ability to trust people. We would be at large of a risk that he could fall back into habits of only going to you."

Killer nods "I dn't see anything wrong wiht that." he glares "We are not leaving him. and you can't make us leave."

Augustus frowns and thinks deeply before nodding "What if. You don't stay in the room with him. but you can remain near? We have our waiting rooms for people between appointments or waiting for pick up. YOu could remain there. That is nearby in case of emergencies and knowing you would be in the building could be helpful to make everything feel safer?"

Nightmare is kinda shocked at how considering this guy is. He had seen others before. Who just demanded everyone do what they say because they know better. And this guy probably knows better. He has seen many people before and helped many people. It is why miss Fauna encouraged them to go to this place in the nearby city over the small town psychologist.

Something about having build this whole thing to help others and everything being specialized to be able to help those who have been hurt in this way.

But here he is... letting them decide stuff.

Killer looks considered and him and Dust share a look. DUst shoots Augustus a look "Why are you being so okay with us wanting things different and special?"

Augustus looks shocked before laughing a bit. Then he smiles "Because we are all different people. Two can have the exact same thing happen to them and have a completely different response to the trauma. Two can have the exact same response to the trauma yet need different healing plans." he sighs "We are all individuals who deal and work through things in our own ways. I can advice the most successful routine and what i have seen works before. But you three will always know you three best. You know what you can and can't handle."

Augustus smiles "Maybe after a very sessions and classes I will have a better personalised idea on what could help Nightmare. But before I can do that I need to get to know him a bit more. The mind is a complex thing. It takes time to understand. And you can't understand it if you aren't willing to listen."

Fauna smiles and nods "THe body is rather easy to heal. It will heal if giving the right things it needs. But the mind won't heal unless it is ready to heal. Until it wants to heal."

Augustus nods "exactly. It takes a lot of effort to work through trauma. But the first step is wanting it. Which is why i won't force a program or routine unto anyone, even if i truly believe it will help them."

Killer and Dust consider it and end up agreeing to talk with everyone at home about it.

They do a few more tests and scans. mostly on his spine and ribs to note down the progress. After that they say goodbye to Fauna and leave the building.

The rain had calmed downa lot and turned into a light drizzle as they walk back towards the truck.

Dust hums and nuzzles his skull "you okay?"

Nightmare shrugs "I don't want to do school there."

Dust blinsk adn laughs "I don't think any of us want you to do that either." then he sighs "But it is slightly required to at least get some help."

Killer groans "For real. If we don't at least try this people will keep being problematic." then he frowns "It is also nice to have more medical experts check your wounds nad magic tiny boss."

Nightmare frowns as he pushes close to Dust and thinks.

Eventually they get to their ride and Nightmare mutters "Only for a little while. Just to calm people down." then he wants homeschool again.

Dust nuzzles his skull "We wouldn't ask anything else of you. an we will be wiht you the whole time."

Yeah... that makes the idea bearable. As long as it doesn't take too long of course.

*-------------------------*

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